I have to admit...

You might think Danielle and I work for the people who made this Halloween kit, but we don't. We are just really really good at decorating things.

I vent a lot on my blog. I assume most of the people who read it know me and what I really think. But recently a venty post blew up into a fight which still isn't over and it is my fault. I got offended about some stupid facebook post and then blogged about it. then she found out and I got more offended about other facebook comments. I had to defriend her because I couldn't stand the status updates about how unchristian I was. Sorry Erin, I shouldn't have written about you on my blog.
Thought I should say that on my blog, right?

So starting today we will have one month of purely positive blogging. I can only commit to one month. Because I am that pathetic. no more funny and sarcastic posts. I can't handle the stress. Personally I feel like we have to joke about problems and humanity, but that's not how everyone deals with it.
In other news I am going to start writing a journal for my extensive venting needs, which I will burn when it is complete

kathryn (October 5, 2010 at 6:38 PM)  

I really do love you Janae!!!

MrSchmooshies (October 5, 2010 at 6:45 PM)  

Please make a password protected blog and share the password with me. Much better than a hand-written journal. Easier to go ALL-CAPS WHEN YOU WANT TO EMPHASIZE SOMETHING too.

The Merrell Family (October 5, 2010 at 9:36 PM)  

I am wishing you luck on your totally happy, positive, and not phony at all blog. :)

Mel (October 5, 2010 at 9:53 PM)  

I've been burned on Facebook by a frenemy before, so I completely understand. But I have to say, I LOVE your snarky posts. I really hope I haven't read the last "dear friend..."

Becky (October 5, 2010 at 11:15 PM)  

Here's my opinion, because I'm sure you care.

It's your blog. You get to say what you want. You put your thoughts and feelings out there and you get feedback. You say what you think and people respond. Some people respond in a positive way, other's don't.

I think that it's important to express yourself. I think it's important to be honest. To speak your truth and to be seen and heard for it. It might be wise, however, to be a bit selective WHO you share your "truth" with because not everyone can hear it. Especially if it's about them.

I quite enjoy reading your blog. Mainly the posts that are brutally honest. Honestly, I just skim over the other stuff. I like the honest stuff. It's refreshing. So much of what I read in blogs is totally filtered because MOST people are afraid to say what they REALLY think because of exactly what just happened to you.

My vote (because you're taking votes, right?) is that you start a private blog in addition to this one where you can be totally honest.

And then you should invite me.

janaemadsen (October 6, 2010 at 12:00 AM)  

oh dear Nichole- I can't guarantee totally positive and not phony.
I don't know if I could be responsible for myself if I had a private blog, I might die of guilt about how terrible I am.

Carlie Madsen (October 6, 2010 at 11:57 AM)  

good luck. i think some more candy give aways are in order. journals make me feel better, but i too will miss your honest posts.

The Wojcicki's (October 6, 2010 at 4:50 PM)  

Excuse me, but SHE wasn't burned... I was! All I did on facebook was the same EXACT thing she's done to me on here.... and she didn't like it so much when it was turned around on her; that people were reading not so nice things, (oh wait... I believe someone called it Brutal honesty) about her! The whole problem is she hangs out with her "friends" and then bad mouths them on her blog. I believe that's WORSE then gossip! Which, those of you that are LDS, have heard the Prophets speak on how much we should NOT do that! So, go ahead, start a private blog, write all about me and others that think their your friends... that's fine. You'll be held accountable for that later. I'm not worried....

Jess (October 6, 2010 at 6:39 PM)  
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Jess (October 6, 2010 at 6:41 PM)  

Wow, I think this has gone a little too far. She did something wrong, she admitted it, she apologized. Maybe it's time to move on.

It's not for me, or you, or anyone else to judge why she is apologizing or to minimize her apology by rationalizing why she might be doing it.

Another part of being Christian, and especially LDS is to learn to forgive. Yes, I've been talked about before, yes, I have a hard time getting over it too. But it doesn't help anyone (including yourself) to keep hashing it out.

People aren't perfect. People's lives aren't perfect. And people don't agree on everything. That's just life.

Luckily, we are blessed with the gift of agency. When something happens to us, we can choose how we will react. Each time something happens to us, it's kind of a little test to see how Christlike we personally can be.

I don't condone talking about "friends" behind their backs, but I also don't agree with mean-spirited side taking.

We don't know what others are going through, how hard their lives are, how they are feeling physically, if they are emotionally depressed, etc. Thankfully, we do not have to have the job of judging their actions.

We make life a lot harder when we try to take that job upon ourselves.

The Wojcicki's (October 6, 2010 at 8:25 PM)  
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Wojcicki's (October 6, 2010 at 8:27 PM)  

To Jess, and others~
Considering she KNOWS what difficulties I am going through, which the list is pretty endless right now, she should have just left me alone. Considering no ones knows what someone is really going through she doesn't really know how this type of thing will affect anyone. I happen to know someone in my life that this would completely ruin their whole world... someone with severe depression. Could you even imagine??!! The fact that I got attacked for stating an opinion is ridiculous. The fact that we are in the same ward and people from our ward read her blog, is awful b/c now I have to wonder who the heck is talking about me. I have never had a problem in this ward until this. I am a convert to the Church and I am still learning many things. I have noticed a few of the posts are about other new converts in our ward. Why should we be targeted? Or someone who wore black shoes with a brown skirt. Maybe that's all they have... why rag on them? She continued to talk about me even after she knew it upset me. She did apologize, but ended it with "thought I should say that on my blog, right?" So it makes one wonder if it's sincere or not. The ONLY reason why I even made a comment on this latest post was b/c I read how a couple of the "followers" thought she should continue to talk about these people... b/c it's funny to them. Why is it wrong for me to defend myself? I have to see this woman every Sunday... and those that are in the ward that read her post. Imagine how uncomfortable that's going to be... for me! But I'm not writing the "super funny" blog so what I feel doesn't matter apparently. As far as forgiving, I did... the first time... and then she wrote about me again...
Considering we do have agency and we get to choose how we react, and considering all that I have on my plate right now... I don't have much wiggle room... and she knows what I'm dealing with at the moment. I'm sure it'll be a topic on here soon enough. I don't believe that I'm "mean-spirited side talking", I believe that I am defending myself and trying to give my point of view on the situation. The only "mean" thing I did, which wasn't even mean really, was let my friends on FB know what was going on, without stating a name or even hinting of who she was and how much it hurt me.
You say we don't know what people are going through and we don't have the job of judging others actions, BUT, that's exactly what's she's doing... Not telling the one girls husband she was pregnant... She clearly had her reasons for keeping that from him. and other topics she's written about that people did or didn't do.....
I'm not necessarily judging her... I am hurt and sad for those who she pretends to be friends with and then talks about. And you're def. right... NO ONE is perfect. But in these blog posts, she def. comes across as thinking that she's better than those she's writing about. I certainly know I'm not perfect in anyway. As I've said, I've been going through loads of awful awful things... things that just make me wonder if I'm even going to make it to the next day... yet, she knew that and continued to do this to me. Makes me wonder now if going Sunday is going to be worth the stress.... But, considering all these followers don't seem to want to open their minds and try to see what it would feel like to have this done to them, well, them I'm wasting my time aren't I????!!??

Becky (October 7, 2010 at 2:29 AM)  

Can I change my vote?

Don't start a private blog.

It's best not to trash people online. Especially not people in your ward.

I was wrong.

Honesty isn't all that great if it is hurtful.

Erin- I think it's great that you commented. Thanks for sharing how you feel and for changing my opinion a bit. And don't skip church. This is only a test. Don't let anybody keep you from going. Take Jenae's opinion for what it's worth. Just her opinion. Don't take it personal. Don't allow other people to define you or to bring you down.

Wow- I'm commenting a lot these days. I don't normally do that.

Go me.

The Wojcicki's (October 7, 2010 at 9:20 AM)  

WOW! Thank you so much Becky! I really appreciate what you had to say and that even if it's a little, I was able to make someone see where I'm coming from. Thank you!

sivab (October 9, 2010 at 4:33 PM)  

This is what it's all about baby! Blogs bringing people together!!!! Awesome!!!

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