Dear Friend,

Dear Friend,
I don't know if you are aware, but a little less than one month ago I turned 30. that's right-a dreaded age but my friends on twitter said 30 was better than 20 so let's see.
The good news: probably not as many children will be born in my 30's. I wanted to be done having children before I turned 31. I should tell you that I'm pregnant now and have vowed never to let this happen to myself again based on how I am currently feeling. NOTE TO SELF: NO MORE BABIES. I guess this time John will have proof. I'm having a baby in December. Hopefully on the 13th because I think while it would drive my sister Claire absolutely crazy, it would also cement this child's spot as her favorite. That is VALUABLE! Claire has also discovered that I am the least responsible birth control taker in the world. TRUE. I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. and I hate you if you want to make a funny joke about it. HATE.

In case you didn't notice, I yell a lot while I'm pregnant. While I am typing at least. That's actually how I found out- it was Danielle's birthday and I lost my temper. Before that I was just planning to call my doctor and get a SERIOUS boost in my anti-depressants. So much crying- it's shameful. Plus my super awesome weight loss had somehow halted and I just REALLY WANTED POWDERED DOUGHNUTS.
The bad news: NO ONE MADE ME PIE!
I know, it's shocking. I attribute some of the pie failure to my birthday falling on Friday the 13th. I figured maybe people thought that my mom would make it for me because she was in town, but they probably forgot that my mom DOESN'T Eat Gluten- OR DAIRY. So no pie from her. Also today John admitted that he doesn't know how to make pie. Unlike cake, which my grandma made me while I visited her in New Hampshire and lamented about her somewhat broken air conditioning and worked slavishly over a quilt for my aunt. She did humor my strong desire to eat animal cookies for about five seconds until I bought them and realized they aren't that good and wanted to leave them in her cupboard.
Anyway back to the pie... Today I was looking in my pantry we bought from IKEA and noticed that I had pumpkin pie filling from a craft day when Claire gave me lots of pie and I wanted to make it myself and bought all the stuff then didn't make it. I told John I still wanted pie. Like chocolate peanut butter or banana cream or WHATEVER. He revealed that he doesn't know how to make pie. Do you know what it is like to be a pregnant lady who really wants pie? because today I took a nap and dreamed about wanting a heath bar even though last time I ate one I literally broke one of my teeth out and I just thought- Maybe I could eat a heath bar pie. That could be good. Or suck, depending on if it had my mom's chocolate cream pie filling and not some stupid pudding pie mix. Sometimes I make my husband Banana cream pie with half vanilla and half banana instant pudding mix and he likes it but I secretly think it is HALF RATE PIE. Definitely not worth the calories, especially with the store bought graham cracker crust.
I bet my sister Carol would make me a pie. If we lived even remotely close.
I can't even think about this anymore. Did I mention slavishly working on a quilt? I sort of want to burn it up but it took too many hours of my life to destroy it. Plus it's not mine. Well like always we didn't finish as many as we wanted to, so we need to schedule another quilting sweat shop week. Maybe this time I will ask my aunt Sara whom I pretty much owe my next child to for all the favors she has done me to watch my kiddos. Let's face it, they aren't the little sweat shop workers they will one day inevitably be.

How was your last birthday?

Alycia ( (June 9, 2011 at 11:27 PM)  

i'm turning 30 next march and am dreading it! and i pity the fool who tells a pregnant lady to stop yelling (in caps) hehe cute blog btw!

Carlie Madsen (June 10, 2011 at 12:23 AM)  

Janae, I promise to make you a pie of your choice before you deliver your third child. Maybe your baby will share my birthday (Dec. 16th), and you can name it after me because I am awesome. LOL.

kathryn (June 10, 2011 at 1:02 AM)  

Yay!!! Yay for another cutie baby! Boo for you feeling sick!

NaDell (June 10, 2011 at 5:33 AM)  

Well now I WANT PIE too! It's my birthday next week. Maybe I'll get some. I love the Hershey pie at Burger King, but I also really like the instant jello packets from the store. =)
Hope you get some pie soon. Send John some you tube links of how to make pie. (I didn't check that there really are videoes, I'm just guessing that there are...)

sivab (June 10, 2011 at 8:31 AM)  

Janae I would love to make you a pie. For awhile Mark and I had pie Tuesdays because sometimes you do just need pie and how else are you supposed to find the perfect pie if you don't make one once a week? PS I know you are a grumpy pregnant lady but it makes me laugh and I miss you.

The Blind Spot (June 10, 2011 at 2:58 PM)  

You're sweet and funny and you have every right to crave pie and be grumpy because you're pregnant! Again, wow. Herzlichen Gl├╝ckwunsch. I hope I'm done having my first baby by 35. And now I want Erdbeertorte (and I'm not even pregnant).

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