Dear Friend,

Dear Carrie,
It has come to my attention that you were wearing highly low cut and not very flattering jeans last night.
Your waist looked non-existent in your tight black pants.  Maybe you should rethink that look a little bit. Not that you looked bad, it's just that it made your torso look odd. My stomach totally doesn't look like that when I am wearing low cut pants.  I think it looks a little bit pregnant. I don't know if you know this but I had stretch marks on my stomach and they were all faded but I feel like they are coming back.  Lucky for me I get the light colored ones, which match my perfectly tube sock white skin. How about you?  It wasn't looking like you had any on Dancing with the Stars last night.  Also how do you fly all the way there?  I'm starting to be convinced that Dancing with the Stars isn't actually live.
Also, get some better facebook pictures, your lack of face shots is really ruining my blog desires this morning.
xoxo
Janae

sivab (September 27, 2011 at 11:43 AM)  

While I envy your friend's 36 pack, I have to admit her torso looks about 4 times longer than the average human in those lower than lower pants.

Carrie Randall (September 27, 2011 at 7:41 PM)  

While I'm super flattered that you think I look like her, I have to warn you that I do have an awkwardly long torso, unfortunately I don't own any shiny, tight, ultra-low pants and I definitely don't have a 6 pack like that!

janaemadsen (September 27, 2011 at 11:59 PM)  

oh carrie- I know you are lying.
at least about the pants :-) you totally look like her.

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