Rammidy Rammity

I really like being Bowser on Mario Kart. He is a big character so when I drive I get to just go wherever I want and ram other people off the road. I like ramming. This makes me a bit of a hazard in the team games but I just really like that if anyone runs in to me, it is their fault.
You might ask yourself why this is important. believe me it is. I think it means I need a bigger car mainly. You see maybe the same thing could apply to driving. What kind of car would I need? I think I should blame the video game for my desire to sometimes ram the other players, like the people who cut you off then slow down 20 miles.
We have done a lot of driving this summer- and I have learned that the enemy of cruise control is the competitive driver. These are the drivers that really make me crazy. You set the cruise and come up on them and they speed up just so you can't pass them. Then you give up and they slow down again. Like it's a race. As soon as they realize they are about to lose their spot they freak out, then stop paying attention and slow again. Competitive drivers want you to maintain the status quo- where they are ahead. They want you to know that they were always going fast and your passing is an insult. Maybe they don't have cruise control- and I wish I had some kind of car sign that says- you are the one with the crazy changing speed jerkface. My favorite thing? A competitive driver that gets pulled over when they are trying really hard to establish their dominance.
The other day I was at the grocery store and the strangest thing happened. I met a competitive driver in the aisle. I was trying to look at things and she kept getting in front of me- slow down, speed up, she was just following me. Even though I didn't need anything in the aisle we met in, she was not going to let me pass her. I didn't realize how effective people could be at blocking a shopping aisle where really two carts could fit comfortably past. Normally you can ask people to move to the side but not really when they are still moving and you just want to pass them. She had two whining kids and a shoulder length brown hair with a tight perm. I never did pass her.
The other day at the park Danielle was playing and a kid wanted her to get out of the wooden boat- a competitive driver in the making. Too bad there aren't more adults around to tell those people to let the kid who got their first stay in the fast lane.