Insomnia and Fall Down Tree

Turns out that I can't really stay asleep for very long these days. I really hate it when people tell me that even though I want to have the baby now in a few weeks I will be wishing the baby was still inside of me because I will be so tired. I don't know many new moms who wish themselves 38 weeks pregnant, especially when they don't sleep anyway. So I do what anyone would do if they knew they should be asleep and will be VERY tired soon... I get a water bottle and a bowl of cereal and shop online. then I think about crying when I am ready to go back to bed and Danielle wakes up. Can this house be causing insomnia? A few mornings I've woken up only to find Danielle at some point in the night has climbed into our bed and is now kicking me in the face or has a big wet diaper in my face. Why am I the only one who wakes up to the smell of a diaper across the bed from me?

Here is something I love.
Well I found some really cute prints for the nursery. Falldowntree.etsy.com makes the cutest little animal prints. this set of six prints is only 75 dollars. they measure 10 by 10 and I think the beaver is surprisingly silly and fun. If you look at Falldowntree.com you can see more of their work.
Daniele really loves animals right now, especially frogs it turns out. She looks at the prints and talks about the new baby, then shows me her frogs. Her frogs go to visit the other animals in the babies room, and sometimes the animals come to visit the frogs or just generally go missing.

Falldowntree also has some really cute robot prints and one about monster friends. If you go to their website they have printable coloring pages. I printed out the Giraffe which is a standard 8 by 10 size. I really like it when they have pages that print on only one page instead of that extra blank page that always seems to come out as a bonus when I print things.
I was going to post about the artist but I can't find much. His name is Adam and he likes to draw and he sent my prints in a record album cover. That seemed really smart because it arrived unscathed. I guess they really don't try to bed records, which is different for the Postal Service.
Like many cute things in my life, I am pretty sure that Rachelle found this artist. Looking through her favorites on etsy is one of the best ways that I've found to shop.

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Dear Friend

Dear friend,
I was so excited to hear about your victory of getting "back in your jeans" after the baby. I have to admit I never accomplished that with my first baby.
Until I saw the picture. I know it is really frustrating to get pregnant and gain weight and not quite be able to button up that top button anymore. Also wearing those bright red jeans with tapered legs that looked almost pegged at the bottom was quite a fashion statement.
I don't know how to say it politely, but maybe you should have waited a little longer. Maybe actually you should throw those jeans away. You have asked me many times about your clothes and if they are good and I never quite have the heart to tell you that they are, but you wear jeans that are ridiculously too small. Now the biggest jean offense is wearing tapered leg jeans with that extra room in the front for your paunchy front butt and I know that you don't have one- so I salute you there. If you just had a baby and people learn about your anatomy changes from your jeans probably you need bigger jeans. Maybe Tori Spelling could wear those jeans you picked. If you ever get a wedgie from jeans you have probably selected the wrong jeans to wear.
Please stop buying pants that fit you. Please start getting them a little baggy. What you consider baggy might just fit you. I'm sure a salesperson could help you find something called a "bootcut," or a "tunic top." I've really only had one friend that successfully pulled off the pink jeans. I am not sure but when they have fashion tips for the "pear shape" I think they should tell you to avoid super duper tight jeans.
Congratulations on the baby and being super skinny.
Good luck and hope you get lots of sleep,
Janae

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The Next Ten

Well future friends, it is time for you to invite us over to your house for a wonderful meal. Or just drop by some muffins. If you are always complaining about your spouse or talking about how you have a new get rich scheme I am not interested. But I will participate in your child's fund raiser. Especially if they are a girl scout or selling world's finest chocolates- does anyone do that anymore? I could literally cry about the lack of mint meltaways in my life. the one's from World's Finest Chocolates. YUMMY.
I was happy to see comments from my last post- but did Brooke just say she was a right wing nut job? I don't know how to respond. maybe with more questions.

Here are some more important questions.
1. How many pairs of shoes do you own? What do you think about "comfort shoes?" Just yesterday I was looking online and saw what looked like the perfect pair of brown closed toed high heeled pumps. but they are $365.00 so I decided not to buy them. Just like the shoes I fell in love with in New Jersey that were $700.00. and pink.
2. How often would you say that you shop online?
3. How do you feel about dogs?
4. What type of pizza do you like to eat?
6. Ice cream?
7. What is your favorite board game?
8. Do you like to work on projects? Name five things on your project list right now.
9. Do you live in superlatives? That can be quite amusing. We have a friend with the BEST AND BIGGEST LIFE EVER! Of course our other friend with the HARDEST AND WORST life ever doesn't like them. Strange how that works out.
10. Will you make me muffins or cookies? When?

Stay tuned for the third and final installment of questions....

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Baby Names

I like the name Jack. but wouldn't it be that much cooler to name him Jackal and call him Jack? As baby comes closer I feel more than a little unprepared in terms of names. And everything for that matter. Here are some end of pregnancy thoughts.

1. Muffins. Yum. I love muffins.
2. Naming kids is a terrible thing to do. Don't EVER get personalized items for a baby before they are born. although I have a onesie for my baby that proclaims him an astrological sign that will not be true if he is born after the 23rd. Wishful thinking.
   
3. Why don't people name their children the name they want to give them? My friends have some friends who named their baby one thing and call him an altered version of his middle name. Now I'm not adopted but I am sure that a name identity crisis is hard- like finding out you are adopted. Unless you don't like your name.
4. On Sunday I took my shoes off and my fat feet were swollen through part of the strap. Maybe it is time to stop going to church. There was a lady there with an ENTIRE TOE sticking out of her "peep toe" shoes. I wanted to do an intervention. She was also wearing black nylons with the line just a little crooked across her fat peeping toe.
5. Why does the thought of vacuuming the stairs make me want to cry? Sleep first, then cry.
   
6. I hate moving. I hate even more other people going through my stuff and making comments. The exception to this rule is my sisters, who seem to like everything I get and are generally quite understanding about why it is important to buy clearance boy bedding when you had a girl. Otherwise we wouldn't have any bedding now. Except flower bedding that Danielle does not want to share. She told me.
7. Why would anyone name a show "Toot and Puddle"? Stupid.
8. Why am I awake right now?
9. Why do people ask you if you need help unpacking when you are clearly very pregnant? This is like the stupidest question in the world, asking someone who is in labor how they are doing. They are not doing well. It is slightly rude to ask- like asking someone who just threw up all over their own shirt how they are feeling. The Best Ever!
10. Muffins.
    

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New house New Friends

So I decided that I might need to find some new friends. Not that I'm unwilling to drive two to four hours to visit people I already know since I have to go that far anyway to find a place to shop, but some people seem to think it is too far.
Finding friends is an intensely painful experience. It's like a job interview except you never have the promise of getting paid. I hate getting to know people and then realizing they don't really like you. Which is why I like hanging out with people for specific reasons- like "these are Andy and Nadell, we all like to play games." I guess most of our friends like to play games. I thought of an ongoing potential friend interview process that I should start instituting. With a series of questionnaire that can be filled out online- maybe in the comment section of my blog- I can screen people for their interests and figure out if we should try to schedule something.
My other least favorite thing is scheduling something with other people. Calling someone to schedule a hang out is almost as bad as ordering pizza.

First 10 questions.
1. Do you like playing games? Describe.
2. Describe your political feelings. What do the words "right wing nut job" mean to you? What about "liberali"?
3. Are you sarcastic?
4. What does the word "worldliness" mean to you. Essay answers are accepted.
5. How religious do you think you are? Why?
6. Describe how a two year old child should act.
7. Do you have any food/pet allergies?
8. What do you like to eat when hanging out with other people?
9. How do you feel about Wal Mart?
10. How late is too late for starting a hang out on a weekend? Weekday?

These questions are important. It is difficult finding couple friends because you have to like both of them and even more difficult when children are involved because then you have to like their kids and your kids have to like their kids.
Sometimes I almost understand people who don't seem to hang out with anyone.
Except then there is no one to play board games with, and Danielle probably shouldn't see some of the movies I want to see.

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